Sussan Ley To Consult Her Numerologist About Challenging Dutton

With news over night of another round of dreadful polling numbers for Opposition leader Peter Dutton there is talk amongst the Liberals of a potential leadership spill.

Some challengers have been working the phones to shore up numbers, whilst deputy leader Sussan Ley has booked in some time with her numerologist to see if they believe that she has the numbers.

”Numerology has just been the greatest addition to my life,” said the deputy leader. ”Before, I was Susan who got nowhere. Now I’m Sussan who’s deputy leader of the unpopular Liberal party.”

When asked if she would challenge the Dark Lord Peter Dutton for the leadership, Sussan said: ”Peter has my full support and as long as he wants to be leader and Rupert supports him as leader then I will not challenge.”

”However, you never know when the tea leaves will change. Which probably explains why Peter has banned tea in all Opposition meetings.”

Mark Williamson


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