ScoMo Says: ”I’m Not Racist, But….”

Australian Prime Minister (for now) Scott Morrison has defended himself against accusations that he has used racial slurs in the past by declaring that he’s not racist, but…….

”Australians know that under my Government if you have a go, you’ll get a go and everything will be all white, I mean all right. I said “all right”,” declared the PM. ”Anyway, I’m not racist. Some of my closest friends have swiss bank accounts!”

”Angus Taylor for instance.”

When asked why all of a sudden all these accusations and character assessments were coming out, not from Labor, but from his own side, the PM said: ”Well, that’s simple – because Anthony Albanese isn’t saying anything.”

”This is all on Labor. It’s time they fronted up to the Australian people and told them what they stand for.”

”The Australian people know what I stand for, they know what my Minister for the Dark Arts Peter Dutton stands for.”

”Now, if you’ll excuse me, the Dark Lord Peter Dutton’s birthday is coming up and he loves nothing more than strangling a puppy, so I’m off to buy him a litter.”

Mark Williamson


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Categories: Politics

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