ScoMo Asks Jen To Ring In Sick For Him As Parliament Returns

Australia’s former Prime Minister and no fan of the UN Scott Morrison has today asked his wife Jen if she could ring his new boss the Dark Lord Peter Dutton and tell him he won’t be coming in to work today as he feels a bit ill.

”Had a bit of a big weekend and to be honest I’m not feeling too crash hot,” said the Member for Cook. ”I’d call Pete myself, but the throat is a bit croaky.”

”I reckon I should be good to go back to work maybe late next week, better to be safe than sorry.”

When asked if he expected to see out his term as the Member for Cook, Scotty from marketing said: ”I reject the premise of your question, sorry old habit.”

”Look, the people of Cook are good people, they’re my people and they want what’s best for me, which is also what’s best for me.”

”Now, if you’ll excuse me, I have a bit of day time TV to catch up on.”

Mark Williamson


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Categories: Politics

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