Families man and aspiring Nationals party leader Barnaby Joyce has announced that this Friday night he will jump over a shark whilst riding a coal powered motor bike.
“For too long people in this country have been demonising coal, so this Friday night I will show not only Australia but the world what coal can do,” said Special Envoy for the Drought Barnaby Joyce. “I bet my so called colleague Michael What’s His Name won’t be doing this.”
“Knowing him he’ll probably be at home with his wife and kids like the married man he is. Not old Barnaby though I’m gonna jump a shark, again.”
When asked how jumping a shark on a coal fired motor bike would benefit anyone let alone the Morrison Government this close to an election, Mr Joyce replied: “Heyyyyy the only ones opposed to this would be some tree hugging hippie. I mean it’s me Barnaby on a bike jumping a shark, if that won’t get the girls I mean voters then what will.”
As well as Barnaby Joyce jumping a shark, Friday night will also include entertainment from Tony Abbott who will attempt to set a world record for the number of back flips done over a single policy issue.