The Australian Government is currently torn between two of it’s loves – that of billionaire Andrew ‘Twiggy’ Forrest and stirring up and promoting anti-Asian sentiment.
“It’s a tough spot that we find ourselves in,” said a Government Spokesperson. “Let’s get this straight. We love Twiggy, we love all of our billionaires, but we do also like stirring up the community against foreigners.”
“I mean, if we don’t get the ball rolling on blaming China for all of this then we run the risk of losing ground to Katter or Hanson.”
”You just know that they are chomping at the bit to have a go at the Asians.”
When asked whether the Government was concerned about igniting a trade war with China, the Spokesperson said: ”It’s a tightrope that we are walking. We need China to keep buying our stuff, but you know, stirring up the public about Asians is always good for votes.”
”I mean, we have to follow Trump, and he’s saying this is all on China, so…”
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