Opposition leader Anthony ‘Albo’ Albanese has reacted to the latest Newspoll by announcing that he will embark on a Nationwide DJ tour in an effort to boost his sagging popularity.
“We’ve seen the polls and to be fair it is early days but I think it’s time to head out onto the road and do what I do best and that’s spin some tunes and skoll a couple of local IPA’s” said Opposition leader Albo. “It has been a long time since I got behind the decks anywhere else other than inner city Sydney or Melbourne.”
“Maybe the people in Albury Wodonga or even Far North Queensland don’t even know that I DJ.”
When asked whether a National DJ tour was the best course of action to be taking rather than say a listening tour or maybe even releasing a policy or two Opposition leader Albo said: “Ah, look what happened to old Mate Bill Shorten, he listened and had policies but he ain’t the PM.”
“What the people want is someone like Hawkey, who can skoll a beer and spin some tunes and that’s why DJ ALbo is heading out on tour.”