Australia’s acting PM Barnaby Joyce (yes, really) has used his first day in charge to recall Parliament in order to overturn the contentious bonk ban.
”There are wars going on, towns are getting flooded and the pandemic is still here. For God’s sake – it’s time to get rid of this bloody bonk ban,” said the Member for New England. ”How’s an MP supposed to think if he’s only allowed to bonk his significant other?”
”Scotty, err, ScoMo, can always get down on his knees and pray when he’s stressed, whereas I’d rather get down on my knees and do other stuff.”
When asked if he seriously thought that the priority of the nation right now should be on repealing the bonk ban, the acting PM said: ”Well Scott, err, ScoMo, spent weeks focusing on his pet project – the religious discrimination act!”
”So, why can’t I focus on my passion?”
”Now, if you’ll excuse me, I’ve got to go and chat to Albo, man-to-man, about whether he’d be up for doing a bit of intern swapping, if you know what I mean.”
You can follow The (un)Australian on twitter @TheUnOz or like us on Facebook https://www.facebook.com/theunoz.
We’re also on Patreon: https://www.patreon.com/theunoz
The (un)Australian Live At The Newsagency Recorded live, to purchase click here: