Man Who Can’t Count To 43 Doesn’t Rule Out Becoming Treasurer

The Dark Lord Peter Dutton has been keenly following his colleague Josh Frydenberg’s struggles to retain his seat at the upcoming election, telling his fellow Death Eaters that he’d consider becoming Treasurer should the opportunity arise.

”The Dark Lord has long coveted the top job,” said a Death Eater close to He Who Can’t Be Named. ”He views Morrison as someone who is necessary in the short term but expendable in the long term.”

”As for Josh, well if he were to fall then someone needs to step in, why not the Dark lord?”

When asked why given his numerous failings with numbers over the years he now feels ready to control the Nation’s finances, the Dark Lord’s Spokes Death Eater said: ”You don’t need to have the numbers to be Treasurer you just need to dole out the cash to those who are worthy.”

”The Dark Lord has many projects he wishes to fund like building a Death Star, oh wait, I shouldn’t have said that.”

”Forget what I said about the Death Star, please don’t publish that. He’ll have me killed, or worse, put on the campaign trail with our candidate for Warringah.”

Mark Williamson


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Categories: Politics

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