Sky News Tells Its Viewers (All 6 Of Them) To Get Out And Support ScoMo

Niche news network Sky News Australia has launched a call-to-arms to their viewers, all 6 of them, to get out and support the Prime Minister Scotty-who-was-fired-from-Marketing.

”Sure, the polls aren’t looking great at the moment for our dear leader,” said a Sky News spokesperson. ”But, Australians need to give him a go!”

”Australia needs ScoMo! Come on, all you satirists! How many jokes will you be able to make about Albo?!”

When asked why Sky News still bothered to put on shows, given its ridiculously low ratings, the spokesperson said: ”Come on, that’s a bit harsh. I mean, last week Paul Murray had at least 8 people tune in.”

”And don’t forget Peta Credlin! She had 9 people watch her show last year – so close to breaking the double digit viewing mark!”

”Now, if you’ll excuse me, I need to go and see if there are any telephone booths left on the Mornington Peninsula, as Andrew Bolt wants to have a meeting of his fan club.”

Mark Williamson


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