Barnaby Denies Giving Littleproud A Wedgie

Aspiring shadow Minister for Home Affairs Barnaby Joyce has denied giving his colleague David Littleproud a wedgie this morning and insisted it was just a miscommunication.

”Look David asked me if his tie was straight and it wasn’t, so I endeavoured to fix it for him,’ said the member for New England. ”He went left, I went right and next thing you know his undies are over his head.”

”These things happen, we move on.”

When asked how he was feeling ahead of today’s leadership spill, former Minister Joyce said: ”A bit nervous, you know I do have families to think of and it’s a big pay cut not being in the top job.”

”Here’s hoping my colleagues see sense and go with me being in the tent pissing out rather than out of the tent pissing in.”

”Speaking of which I’m off to drain the lizard before the meeting.”

Mark Williamson

@MWChatShow

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