Australia Needs A Dick Tata Declares News Corp

The Australian Government’s propaganda arm News Corp has come out strongly today endorsing Minister for the Dark Arts Peter Dutton as Australia’s next top Dick Tata.

”I am quite flattered to be thought of in that light,” said the Dark Lord. ”A lot of people see me as some sort of monster, I don’t know why.”

”You haven’t seen a puppy running around have you? I was planning on strangling it later.”

When asked if he had plans to challenge the current Prime Minister for his job, the Dark Lord said: ”Scott, err…ScoMo is my Prime Minister and I am ambitious for him.”

”If however something were to happen to Scott, err ScoMo, like I don’t know a piano should fall om him, or maybe he is attacked by a giant snake, then I will assess my options.”

”Now, if you’ll excuse me, I need to head to the pet store to buy a giant snake.”

Mark Williamson


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Categories: Politics

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